i dont use Office really at all, maybe apoinements but i dont think thats part of it, can i remove Office (ie. excel PPT etc) with out flashing new rom, i dont have a backup of Contacts yet so im wondering if this is Possible

as far as I know, you can't remove Office without cooking a Custom ROM, I don't think it's possible to remove from your carrier's stock ROM.

Since its in the rom, why bother?

Nothing to gain except a little ROM IF you cooked a new custom ROM. If your ROM is that low, you should move some things to an external ROM.

im not worried about that i want more space and less mem usuage and such, im going to wait for the update and get\build my own i dont have a werking machine so i can do anything. i know there are good ones out there so i may trial and error some of those.

Removing office will not give you more memory. Only running programs are using memory. As long as you don't start the program it is not affecting you.

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As JKingGrim said, if it isn't running, it isn't in ram using memory.
Though there IS a little Outlook bit that is loaded on startup to check your email if you schedule email checking. You can simply remove the shortcut from the startup folder and soft reboot to take it out of ram. But I believe it is only good for 24K or so.

U may need it one day; I wouldn't do it. Its better to have it and not
need it; than to need it and not have it.